Sometimes a realization comes suddenly without conscious introduction or a clear chain of events in thoughts. These are often familiar concepts learned in a rational logical philosophical manner. Learned but not realized… There is a big difference in a stated concept and a fully realized experience. Some might call it an epiphany. Today, everything came together and many things suddenly were clear. Why do we cling to drama? Why do we cling to pain from the past? Why do we carry our rage inside us like a pregnant needy abandoned creature scavenging for food to feed it and make it grow stronger? I believe we do this because we have a score to settle and we cannot let it go until we extract justice in the form of revenge. I also believe we get something from the toxic energy that feeds something within us that has gotten out of control and has inserted itself into us. We then believe it to be who we are and we need it to define ourselves. Past lovers, past friends, past family members, people and events in our lives that eat away at us and result in outbursts are traps. They trap us inside and they prevent us from living. They attach like a parasite or like a cancer. They take energy. They alienate you from those who would love you. You are not your emotions. The goal for many people is ongoing: to set themselves free and escape from the trap.

Jarboe